I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Randomize
