she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
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I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
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Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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