dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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