The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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