so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
