Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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