It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize
