i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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