I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
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