Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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