did you get engaged???
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
