I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize