so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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