it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Randomize