I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
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