how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
