Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
