Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
And then he peed in my hair
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