Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize