I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Randomize
