He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize