So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
