are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
