She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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