yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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