I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
The power of my boobs compel you
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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