wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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