This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Randomize
