FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Randomize
