the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
