All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
