rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Randomize
