is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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