I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
