Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
