Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
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