The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
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We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
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Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.