Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you