I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Nicole vs. Life
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
