How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize
