Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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