It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
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