We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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