Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
zippers are such a cool invention
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Randomize
