i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize