Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize