from now on my penis is your penis
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
