The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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