I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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