Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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