just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
how drunk are you?
Several
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
