My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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